This month has mainly consisted of a lot of self care, healing and discovery. One exercise that got me thinking was drawing a time line from birth to 2016 and writing down significant things that happened – good or bad. That wasn’t really the part that got me thinking as I have done this before, although it was good for dusting off the ole memory and also interesting that different memories pop up when redoing this exercise. The real thinking started when I was asked to write down what advice I would give myself during that time. Being a kid of the 80s in the UK I have inevitably seen ‘Back to the Future’ so I know its dangerous to know too much about the future.
Even though my life isn’t ‘perfect’, I have never really wanted to change anything from the past to make my future different. Even the bad home perm hair at 15. There have been some mistakes and detours I could have avoided with a heads up from my older self. There are people it may have been wiser to avoid, and others to cherish more as their time with me was short. But if my journey in this life is like the yellow brick road in the Wizard of Oz. Would I advise myself to click my heels together so I could get back home?
If I did, it would save a lot of heartache, trauma and drama to be sure. But in doing that I would have missed the point of coming to Oz. I came to grow and develop and that means going through all that I have. Redoing some lessons as I didn’t get them the first time around. In not travelling down the brick road, I would have missed all the breathtaking scenery out there – in colour not black and white! I would have missed the eclectic selection of friends who are my mirrors and my medicine, as I am for them.
When I was younger it annoyed me that Glenda (the Good Witch of the North) knew about the heel clicking all along. Why didn’t she share her knowledge to save all that hurt and trouble? Why go through all that suffering? Now a fair bit older, I can see that she helped Dorothy more by allowing her to walk the path she had chosen before coming to Oz, and she made sure those ruby slippers were on her feet. In that way she was always there, guiding every step of the way. We all have our guides. I for one am pleased not all chose to wear the pink taffeta dress though!
In my opinion the most important character was the Wicked Witch of the West, feared or even hated, she probably taught Dorothy more about herself than anyone or anything else. Therefore she was a fundamental part of the journey. Maybe Dorothy is actually grateful for Elphaba coming into her life and is not sat there wishing she had avoided her or done things differently. Maybe she is being kind to herself and accepting she did what she did what all the knowledge and skills she knew at the time. Anyone who has watched Wicked knows Elphaba had her own path too. Maybe its as a friend once described to me, that when our contracts are up in this lifetime we will have a laugh about the characters played in this one and whether we managed to learn what we needed from the experience or not. I will have some laughing to do then.
So what would I tell my younger self when going through a significant event? The common thread that seems to run through is about love, hope and trust. About learning. Healing. Self care. All given (hopefully) without unravelling the very fabric of space-time continuum.
Ever wondered what you would tell your younger self?